He wondered why
by 957music
Summary: Gibbs wonders what's wrong with Ziva, he wants to help...Rated M.
1. Chapter 1

GIBBS POV

Her name was Ziva David. She was the most beautiful woman to walk the Earth; at least that's what he thought and few people would argue that he was wrong. Her caramel colored skin and chocolate curls upon her head made her look like a luscious candy. He longed for her body, to touch her, to feel her and to hear her moan. But as these thoughts crossed his mind he silently cursed himself. He was much too old for her, she would never want someone like him, but he was wrong.

ZIVA POV

She lay on her back, staring at the ceiling wishing that it was his face instead of a blank canvas. She tossed and turned wanting him beside her so badly. Wanting him _inside _her so badly. A few tears rolled down her soft face staining the caramel colored skin. She felt so much pain at not being able to tell him she loved him. She sighed and waited for sleep to envelop her, and envelop her it did.

GIBBS POV

He awoke early the next morning and as he rolled out of bed he groaned and growled at the same time. He groaned because he had the most painful erection he'd ever experienced. It pulsated and ached, waiting for release. He growled because he realized that his briefs were wet and sticky. The joys of being a man, he thought to himself. He stood and walked into his bathroom. It was plain and was what you would expect a man like Gibbs to have as a bathroom. He stripped off his briefs and threw them in the laundry basket and started the shower. Stepping into the warm water he wondered why he hadn't chosen a cold shower on this particular morning. But without realizing, he grasped his erection, groaning both in pain and in pleasure. He ran his hand from base to tip, harder, faster, harder, and faster. Release finally washed over him. He shuddered as he watched his efforts wash down the drain. He felt guilty. Guilty because of the woman he thought of the entire time…

ZIVA POV

Ziva sighed as she padded softly down the stairs. She grabbed the milk and cereal and poured it into a bowl, but as she did so she felt a wave of dizziness wash over her. Tired, she thought. She sat down at her small table and enjoyed her morning breakfast while reading a novel. After she had finished she walked slowly back up the stairs and went to get dressed for the day. While she was getting dressed she felt dizzy again and sat down on the edge of her bed, pulling on her shoes. She recovered and stood and walked down the stairs, grabbed her coat and keys and left her driveway for NCIS.

GIBBS POV

Gibbs was sitting at his desk finishing up a report from one of their cases when the elevator dinged. He looked over to see Ziva stepping out of the elevator with Mcgee following right behind her. As soon as he saw her he looked away as quickly as possible, replaying the morning's events in his mind. He was afraid that if he looked at her long enough she might be able to pick up on his guilt, she had been trained to read people, he quickly remembered. But as he glanced back up at her for just a second more he noticed that she didn't look well, the usual caramel color she had, had turned to a slightly yellow shade. He wondered why…

What do you think? To be continued...


	2. Chapter 2

ZIVA POV

Ziva walked in to the bullpen, purposely avoiding Gibbs's gaze. She felt ill and didn't want to give him any reason to keep her out of the field today. She needed to go outside and get fresh air and she couldn't risk him thinking she wasn't able. Walking to her desk she sat down and placed her head in her hands and rubbed her eyes. A migraine was coming on and she could feel it. She groaned to herself.

GIBBS POV

He heard her groan and he barked across the small office space "Ziva! Are you alright? You don't look like you feel well." Ziva answered back, "I am fine Gibbs, just a headache. I did not sleep well." Gibbs thought silently to himself, "Neither did I." But he answered back, "Take some ibuprofen, we've got a case." He barked orders at the rest of the team and they grabbed their gear and headed toward the elevator. As he walked by he saw Ziva slowly rise out of her chair and grab her gear, so he walked up to her and put his hand on her shoulder and whispered in her ear, "Feel better Zee." And with that he walked to the elevator where the team was waiting.

ZIVA POV

She quickly grabbed her gear and walked to the elevator and stepped in. She was thinking about that whisper, so innocent yet there was something else hidden underneath. But she let all of that go as she stepped out of the elevator with the rest of the team close behind…

***Back at the office***

GIBBS POV

He walked into the bullpen with his usual confident gait, but instead of walking straight to his desk he stopped in front of Ziva's. She had her head down and was groaning softly, her headache must have never gone away, he thought. He stealthily walked behind her desk and stood behind her chair. Staring down at her beautiful neck he had to refrain from bending down and placing feather light kisses on it. Instead he placed his warm, calloused hands on either side of her neck and slowly began to knead the tense muscles there. She let out a sigh, and he knew she was awake. "Jesus, Zee you're tense. Relax a little why don'tcha?" He pressed his thumbs into the hollows where her neck and chest met and she moaned. That one little moan spoke volumes to him…

ZIVA POV

She was sitting there enjoying Gibbs's hands slowly and patiently kneading the knots out of her neck. Tilting her head from side to side to allow his hands more access to her soft neck. She finally lifted her head and leaned back so that she was looking in his eyes. The top of her head lightly touched the front of Gibbs's pants. He groaned. She would have cared had she not felt like she were about to pass out. So she stood with the intention to turn and face him, but before she could everything went dark…

More to come soon! Please tell me what you think so far!


	3. Chapter 3

GIBBS POV

He caught Ziva in his strong arms, gently picking her up and carrying her over to the empty floor space. Kneeling slowly he laid her on the floor as gently as possible. Running over to his desk he got a bottle of water out of one of the drawers and carried it over to Ziva. She moved slightly, and just as he began to panic, she opened her eyes. When she opened them they were glassy and she groaned. He sat down beside her, offering the bottle of water and said, "Zee, there's no way you're driving yourself home tonight." And just as she began to protest he placed a finger over her lips and said, "Shh, you can stay at my place for the night. Would you rather go to my place or to the hospital?" A look of defeat crossed her face and he stood, pulling her to her feet along with him.

ZIVA POV

It wasn't so much the fact that she didn't want to go back to his house, as it was that she was scared of what would happen if she did. But just as that thought crossed her mind, she stopped dead in her tracks and gasped in sheer pain. Gibbs turned around faster than she'd ever seen anyone before. And then he walked over to her, put one arm behind her knees, another behind her upper back and swept her off of her feet. Had it not been for the stabbing pain going right through her head, she would have squealed in surprise. But instead she slowly closed her eyes, tired from the day's work and fell asleep in Gibbs's arms. The last thing she heard was the quiet ding of the elevator arriving…

***AT GIBBS'S HOUSE***

GIBBS POV

It was at times like this that he was glad he didn't lock his door; he kept one arm under Ziva's knees and quickly turned the door knob with his free hand. Walking into his house he left the door open behind him and he walked over to his couch laid Ziva down, and placed a quilt over her sleeping body. She tossed and turned for a minute and then peacefully went back to her deep sleep. He walked over to his door, shut it tightly and for the first time in years he turned the lock. Not because he was scared, but because for the first time in years, there was something in his house that he wanted to protect…

To be continued! Please R&R! It's kind of a sick fic, but kind of not. Stick around to see what happens next!


	4. Chapter 4

*STILL GIBBS POV*

Gibbs sat in the chair opposite his couch, watching Ziva, making sure she that she was okay. He'd not been to bed, or ever left her side for that matter. And Exhaustion was beginning to set in. The lack of sleep from the night before combined with the worry was starting to get to him. As much as he hated to admit it, he wasn't as young as he used to be. But as he watched Ziva he hoped that she could look past his age and just love him, for him. At this thought he stood to stretch his muscles and yawned, making a mental note to have coffee as soon as Ziva awoke from her slumber. He still couldn't help but wonder what was wrong with her. It hadn't been just today, she hadn't been herself lately. She had always arrived at work on time but seemed to lack the energy that he loved so much. He glanced at his watch in the dark, 3:30 A.M the hands read. And just as he turned to sit back in his chair, Ziva whimpered. It was a whimper of pain and it killed him to hear her like that in her sleep. Something that should be peaceful was painful for her and he couldn't bear that…

ZIVA POV

Fast asleep, nightmares ran through her mind. She was standing behind a fence watching Gibbs run back to the car for extra ammunition. He said they would need it, and as usual he was right. That infamous gut of his could predict anything and never once had she known it to be wrong. Just as Gibbs slammed the car door and shoved the ammo in his jacket, a gun fired. Ziva watched in horror as the bullet tore through the chest of the man she loved. Resisting her instinct to run and fight, she ducked from the barrage of bullets. Looking through the holes in the fence, she saw the blood of the man she loved pour out onto the ground and watched as his chest ceased its pattern of rising and falling. And with that she screamed out in anguish because the man she loved was no more…

GIBBS POV

He had begun to succumb to sleep, though only a little. And as he closed his eyes to wash them of the dry burn he felt, he was startled. Ziva was screaming. She screamed in such pain that even Gibbs could feel it. Out of his chair in less than a second, he was kneeling beside the couch. His hand was on Ziva's shoulder, gently shaking her so as to wake her but not alarm her more. And as he whispered, "Zee, Zee, it's okay, I'm here." She awoke with a startle. And as she slowly sat up, Gibbs took the space that was now open and he cradled her head in his hands. He sat there simply whispering, "Shh, shh, it's okay, you're okay now. Breathe." And while he did this he became aware of warm drops of liquid falling on his arms, and was shocked to see that Ziva David was crying...

*STILL GIBBS POV*

Ziva David, crying. That was a sight that Leroy Jethro Gibbs thought that he would never see. A sight that he never wanted to see. Here was this woman, sexy and strong, breaking down in his arms. And for the life of him he couldn't figure out why. What could be so bad that it would bring a woman who killed her own brother, to tears? He placed his thumb under her jaw and tilted it toward him so that he could look in her eyes. And as he looked in her eyes he saw pain, need, and most of all fear. But of what? What would she fear? What could she fear? She was fully capable of defending herself against almost any living thing, but the one thing she feared most wasn't a living thing at all…

ZIVA POV

She felt ashamed and embarrassed. Here she was breaking down in her boss's arms, the one person who shouldn't see her being weak. But to be honest, the tears provided a relief of sorts. A relief because she did not need to speak words for him to know that she was in pain. The migraines and the nightmares were merely a result of unrequited love. Because her worst fear was heartbreak, not that she would ever tell anyone that. A love that she thought would never love her back, and it began to take its toll on her. And as she was looking into his stormy eyes she could see a glint of hope, a small sign that maybe he did love her back. But as she picked up on this, her eyelids became heavy and she fell back to sleep dreaming sweetly in the arms of the man she loved, while Gibbs followed her into the darkness and had sweet dreams of his own…


	5. Chapter 5

GIBBS POV

When he awoke in the morning, he smiled to himself. It was Saturday morning and Ziva was fast asleep with her head nestled in his lap. So as not to wake her, he smoothly slid off of the couch and Ziva stirred, but she did not wake. As Gibbs watched her he wondered if she always looked that beautiful in the morning. He guessed that she probably did, with the morning sun shining on her beautiful skin. And then his thoughts were interrupted by the growl of his stomach, so he made his way into the kitchen. The first stop was the coffee pot; he slid in a filter, scooped out the grounds, poured the water and turned the machine on. A completely familiar routine by now, the calming sound of hot water being turned into coffee was one of his favorites. He tried to be as quiet as possible, all while rummaging through his fridge. As he glanced inside he wondered what Ziva might like to eat. "Pancakes?" he thought to himself. He pulled out the pancake mix and everything else that he would need and put the griddle on the counter and waited for it to heat up. As he was stirring the mixture together, he heard his couch squeak and creak. He looked over his shoulder and saw a beautiful sight. There was Ziva standing in front of the living room window stretching while the morning sun hit her body. She moaned as she stretched from side to side and Gibbs groaned to himself. Just yesterday morning he was having fantasies about this woman and now, here she was in his house.

ZIVA POV

As she stretched, she moaned. Her stiff muscles were loosening themselves up and that's when she realized what she was wearing. She was still in her clothes from yesterday, cargo pants and a tan t-shirt and she suddenly wished she had a change of clothes with her. Her thoughts were interrupted by the smell of something cooking in the kitchen, so she turned around and smiled to herself. There he was standing in the kitchen with a spatula in his hand. He was making pancakes for breakfast, which she found funny so she laughed. As soon as she laughed she realized that he heard her and when he turned around she gave him a devilish smirk.

GIBBS POV

"What are you laughing at?", he said. Ziva said nothing and just sauntered toward the kitchen and laughed some more. He was so preoccupied with what she was doing that he had forgotten about the pancakes. So now they were burning and Ziva was doubled over with laughter. He quickly turned off the griddle and walked toward her, when she saw him coming she stood up and stared him right in the eyes. He never broke his gaze, and as he got closer and closer he could have sworn he felt her heart skip a beat. She was backed against the counter and had nowhere to go, he was only about a foot away from her when he stopped. Never breaking eye contact with her, he leaned forward, his mouth just inches from her soft lips and just when she thought he was going to make her dreams come true he lifted his mouth to her ear and sensually whispered, "You made me burn my pancakes, now we're going to have to figure out something else to eat."

What do you think? There will be more to come. And don't think Gibbs is just going to let Ziva get away without telling him what's wrong.


	6. Chapter 6

GIBBS-"You made me burn my pancakes, now we're going to have to figure out something else to eat…"

ZIVA POV

Ziva's heart stopped. She felt a pang of disappointment that his lips had been so close, and were now so far away. Had she detected a double meaning in his words? Or was just hearing what she wanted to hear? "And what exactly would that be?", she whispered. Still laughing at him she ducked under his arms that were placed on either side of her on the counter. The look of surprise on his face was priceless; his blue eyes were amused yet darkly predatory. Just as he started to walk toward her again, Ziva remembered that she needed new clothes to wear for the day, so she nervously asked, "Do you have any clothes that I could change into?"

GIBBS POV

He laughed at her sudden nervousness. "Of course I do, Zee. They'll be big on ya, but I got something. Come upstairs and I'll give ya something to change in to. You can take a shower while you're up here if ya want." Gibbs grabbed Ziva's hand and led her up the stairs and down the hallway to his bedroom. It was such a strange thing to him, because there hadn't been a woman in his bedroom for years, for anything. Walking into his bedroom he opened up the drawers of his dresser and pulled out and old NCIS t-shirt for her to wear, along with a pair of sweatpants and a pair of his old boxers. He walked over to her and handed he the clothes and pointed toward the bathroom. He said, "Towel is hanging up and soap is in the shower. It smells pretty manly, sorry 'bout that." She said, "Thank you Gibbs, I do not mind." And he watched as she walked toward his bathroom and closed the door behind her.

ZIVA POV

As she walked into his bathroom she looked around for a minute. It was the bathroom of a man, but not just any man. It was the bathroom of Jethro Gibbs. And after observing her surroundings she began to strip off her shirt, her pants and her underwear. The cool air hitting her skin while she walked to the shower and turned it on, adjusting the temperature, she stepped in and let the warm water cascade down her body. She stood like that for a few minutes, letting her hair get wet and hoping that the warm water could wash her worries away. She took the shampoo off of the edge, squirted some in her hand and began to lather it in her hair. Washing her hair, she let the soap run down her body and watched it run down the drain. Sighing, she turned off the water and pulled back the curtain. Shivering from the cold air hitting her body, she grabbed a towel and wrapped it around herself. Grabbing the clothes that Gibbs had given her, she pulled on the boxers, the t-shirt and the sweatpants. She pulled the t-shirt to her nose and took a deep breath. It smelled like Gibbs, and she smiled to herself…

GIBBS POV

Sitting on the edge of his bed, he heard the bathroom door open. He turned slightly and saw Ziva walk out into his bedroom. Her hair was damp and wavy, and it fell like a curtain around her face. When he saw her he said, "Beautiful." But instead of thinking it to himself, he said it out loud and Ziva heard. A hint of a smile appeared on her face as she walked towards him. And she leaned down to him and whispered in his ear, "Thank you, Jethro." And at hearing his name leave her mouth in such a way, he stood, placed his hands on either side of her face and settled his warm lips upon hers…


	7. Chapter 7

ZIVA POV

It was finally happening. Gibbs's lips were on hers and they were leaving soft kisses everywhere they went. She moaned, and when she did so, she opened her mouth to invite him in. He gratefully took the invitation; she felt him slide his tongue into her mouth, tasting her, and wanting to know every part of her. Responding to him she slid her arms around his neck to pull him closer to her. And they pulled away when they needed to breathe. And when they did, they looked in each other's eyes for reassurance. Reassurance that they really loved each other.

GIBBS POV

Looking into Ziva's eyes, he grasped the hem of the t-shirt he had given her and pulled it over her head. He took a sharp intake of breath at the sight of her and began to place kisses upon her stomach and then her breasts. She moaned when he did this, sending a rush right to his groin. He moved lower and hooked his fingers in the waistband of the sweatpants and boxers she was wearing and slowly pulled them to her feet. Reveling at the beauty in front of him, he pulled off his old t-shirt himself and walked back toward her. He moved her slowly backward toward his bed, and when the backs of her knees hit the bed she fell lightly onto it. Placing a knee on either side of her naked body, he lifted her gently and scooted her further back on the bed. Leaning down he placed kisses upon her body, and he kissed the hollow of her neck where her neck and shoulders met. Moving upward, he whispered in her ear, "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen; let me make love to you…"

ZIVA POV

She moaned at his words. The bulge in his pants was pressing into her stomach and so she decided to reach for it. Cupping him in her hands through the rough material of his pants, they both moaned. She reached for his zipper and pulled it down, and watched as he pulled off his jeans and then his boxers. At the sight of him, she bit her lip. Gibbs was the most impressive man she'd ever seen. He moved back over her then, kissing her lips again, and she felt the heat radiating off of his warm body. She whispered in his ear, "Jethro, I need you. Please." Her words came out in a strangled voice, she was begging him and Ziva, never begged.

GIBBS POV

At Ziva's request he kissed her lips, and slipped inside her. He waited to give her time to adjust, and then began moving ever so slowly. They rocked together, never breaking each other's gaze. She began to moan and he knew she was close, so he began to rock a little harder each time. Grunting with each thrust, he groaned out, "Come for me." And at his words, he felt her contract around him. He watched as she threw her head back in pleasure and swore that he would never see a sight that beautiful again, as long as he should he live. A few seconds later, his own pleasure overcame him and he felt his release spill into her body and he shuddered. He leaned down and kissed her lips ever so gently, rolled off of her and cradled her body in his arms. They laid together, completely in love, with each other aware for the first time that the other one felt their love too…


	8. Chapter 8

ZIVA POV

She rested comfortably in his arms, while he ran his thumb up and down her arm. Sitting up, she sighed. He sat up right behind her, and whispered, "Zee, what is going on with you?" And at his words she began to cry, it alarmed him and he wrapped his arms tightly around her. "Settle down Zee, you're going to be alright. Whatever is going on with you I'll be here to help." She simply said, "Jethro, I have been taking fertility drugs, I want a child. They have terrible side effects; migraines, cramps, uncontrollable crying and many other things. I am so sorry. That is why I have not been myself lately." He answered back, "Zee there is no reason to be sorry, if you want a child that is wonderful. I will be here to help you every step of the way." Ziva said, "Jethro, I don't just want _a _child, I want _your _child." With a look of shock and awe on his face, he smiled and said, "Ziva David, you wanting to bear my child is the single greatest privilege of my life." Ziva smiled at Gibbs and placed a chaste kiss upon his lips. He was the most wonderful man she had ever met…

GIBBS POV

"Well, I don't know about you but I am starving.", said Gibbs and Ziva laughed her agreement. He got out of the bed and walked to the foot of it to grab his clothes that had been discarded there earlier. Ziva was watching him and licking her lips as she too got out of bed. She walked behind Gibbs and wrapped her arms around his body, sliding her hands down his front and cupping him in her hands. Gibbs laughed and said, "Zee as much as I want you right now, I'm starving and so are you, and if we want to be able to continue this later we'll need our energy." Ziva's laugh rang out like bells, and Gibbs turned around and pressed a kiss to her lips and said, "Come on and get dressed and I'll order Chinese food for us." And with that, Ziva kissed his shoulder and pulled on the old clothes Gibbs had given her earlier…

GIBBS POV

He walked down the steps and into the kitchen where he picked up the phone. Dialing the number for the restaurant, he thought about what to order. Finally he settled on sweet and sour chicken with rice, and won-ton soup. And just as he hung up the phone the stairs creaked and Ziva was sauntering down them. She walked into the kitchen where he was standing and laced her fingers through his, stood on her tiptoes and kissed him with so much passion that it radiated through his body. He laughed, "What was that for?", he asked. "To show you just how much I love you, and to practice for later.", she said with a wink. Gibbs growled at her and picked her up, while Ziva wrapped her legs around him. And he pushed her against a wall and ground against her, while she gasped. "You're in for it later.", he said. She whispered back, "The sooner the better." And with that, the doorbell rang and he let Ziva to her feet with a kiss thinking of the things to come…


	9. Chapter 9

ZIVA POV

They were settled comfortably on the couch with the empty Chinese containers in front of them. She'd never seen a man eat as fast as Gibbs just had. But she couldn't tell whether that was from hunger for food or hunger for something else. She was staring at him sitting beside her with his arm draped over the edge of the couch; when he saw her out of the corner of his eye he reached over for her and pulled her up next to him. Ziva laughed and turned to give him a quick kiss on the lips. "Mmm, Chinese food, just what I want my man to taste like.", and she laughed. Gibbs growled and turned to pull her on top of his lap. "You taste like it too, so let's see if anywhere else taste better.", he said with a chuckle. He kissed down her neck, licking and sucking, making Ziva moan. But then he bit her lightly and she went crazy. Her hands moved to his shirt and pulled it over his head, dragging her nails down his toned chest. While she did this, Gibbs focused on Ziva's clothing; he pulled off her old shirt and kissed her breasts. She then went straight for his button and zipper, pulling down his jeans and boxers in one swift move. When she stood to do this, she also took the chance to pull down the sweatpants and boxers she was wearing from earlier…

GIBBS POV

When Ziva had stripped them both of all of their clothes, he went to stand and grab her. But Ziva placed her hands on his chest and pushed him back down. She leaned down to whisper in his ear, "Jethro, it is my turn now. Let us play fair, yes?". He groaned at her words and reached out for her. Taking his hands, she placed a knee on either side of his body and gave him a long kiss. Opening his mouth, he let her deepen the kiss. Their hands explored each other's bodies, lingering near the places they knew wanted to be touched the most. She rubbed against him and he felt the warm, wet heat radiating off of her body. And just as he broke the kiss to breathe, she ever so slowly took him inside of her. Gibbs let out a shudder of pleasure and it took all of his control to not come at that moment. She then looked into his eyes and said, "I have never loved anyone more, and I cannot imagine that I ever will." And then she began to move above him. Lifting herself off of him all the way, and slowly taking him in as deep as possible over and over and over. He said through gritted teeth, "Zee…unh...Jesus. Zee!...Zee!...ZEEEE!. And with that he emptied himself inside her. After he recovered from the blinding pleasure, he watched her continue to move above him. Reaching down between them, he placed his thumb over the bundle of nerves there and pressed twice, and with that she came. He watched her ride out her pleasure above him, her breasts bouncing and her mouth open. With her head thrown back she let out a cry of his name, "Jethro! God, yes! Jethro! Yes, yes, god…yes!". He watched in amazement at the woman above him. When she came down, he cradled her in his arms, while her head rested on his shoulder. He heard her breathing even out, and realized that she had fallen asleep. Pulling out of her, he heard her whimper and smiled to himself. He picked her up in his arms and carried her upstairs to the bed; covering her with a blanket, she opened her eyes ever so slightly and whispered, "Thank you. Love you…" And she fell into a peaceful sleep, with the man she loved right beside her…


End file.
